A Delayed Reply

-Written by Sweets*

Today, as I was checking my mail, I came upon a particular one that really brought tears to my eyes.

It had been waiting to be read for a while hidden under the tons of mail that I still need to read. 

It was a desperate call for help that unfortunately, due to the immense number of mail that I get 

I had only seen it til today. Immediately I tried to find this Pico but unfortunately, he was nowhere 

to be found. My only hope is that he is alright and that he and his family seeks the help 

that was so much needed to heal the parent/child relationship.

Once, someone asked me, "Sweets*, why do you take it on yourself to help these kids that write 

to you for help, shouldn't they been asking their own parents for help instead of you?" 

I was stunned by the question. How can I as a human and as a mother not care to help someone 

that is hurting?  Should I ignore their pain, and their problems just because I am not their parent? 

I can't and I won't!

Some of the people that seek help and advice from me are mostly kids that sadly might not have

the kind of relationship with their parents where they can sit down, be listened to, and be understood,

and where they can find comfort and encouragement.

It is very important as a parent to give great importance to what is bothering our children

so they can feel comfortable enough to come to us and share what is going on in their lives, good 

and bad. No matter how big or small their problems might seem to us parents/grownups, 

if it's affecting, hurting and making our child sad, then it should be important to us. Aren't we 

parents supposed to protect, guide and love our children? Having them is a privilege, a blessing.

 Loving them is caring and listening and not dismissing so easily what they have to say.

I also noticed that many kids try to find comfort in this sort of game. They come here searching 

for what is lacking in their real life and that is so sad. However, not only do kids do that, 

grownups do it as well. Once I met a young photographer in his mid-20s in Second Life. 

And after talking about my photo we started talking for a while and he said to me, "Lori, real life is so painful for me, so hard. I only find peace when I come here. This is my escape. I feel accepted and loved only here. In real life, I am so lonely."

What we need to understand and never forget is, that real life, no matter how hard it might be, 

is the life where we are supposed to be living. We can't and shouldn't try to live a "life" here in Pico 

or any other virtual world. What we should do is work on healing our real life by seeking help 

from professionals or spiritual guidance from our church.

Remember, my beautiful Picos, that once at the end of one of my posts I wrote, "take care of each

other", and I meant it. Treat everyone kindly for you may never know what other people you meet might be going through. Be always willing to listen. For many, it is just what they need. We all need to feel that we matter and that people care. Keep your heart always open to anyone in need.

To the Pico that wrote to me this letter;

I am very sorry I wasn't there when you needed me. My heart goes out to you and I only hope that

you are doing fine. Know that I care and that your feelings matter to me. I know you are a wonderful

kid because despite all the sadness you are going through you still find the strength to help others :)

You are a trooper. I feel that the biggest problem you are encountering is good communication with

your parents. You seek shelter in Pico, avoiding the problem, and as a result of that, they label you with very degrading names that worsen everything. It is like a circle of mistakes that one thing causes another, all reacting to one another in a destructive way. The only way to stop this cycle is by truly

communicating, listening and caring for each other.

If you see this, please get in contact with me. I am truly worried and I would like to hear from you.

You and your family are in my prayers <333

THE LETTER:

Dear Sweets,

I am one of the many fans of your blog. I usually don't turn to others for advice but I really need help

this time. On my own blog, I put posts on how I help others because it makes me happy. I've always

been so busy helping others, I haven't been helping myself.

I have depression issues and have suicidal thoughts and even hurt myself. 

My relationship with my parents and I are strained. Just looking at each other has become awkward.

I've become obsessed with Pico and my parents hate it.

They keep saying Pico changed you so much and has ruined your life. 

I love Pico so much because it makes me happy. They don't understand that. 

It's true that I'd rather be on Pico than be with them but that's only because 

Pico is practically my life.

My own mother called me a useless retard' and that hurt a lot. My parents keep asking me why I'm

such a weirdo and why I can't just be normal. I know normality doesn't exist but when your own

parents say that, it really broke my heart.

Please, I hope you get this message. I ask for your help to hopefully 

pull me out of my depression and make me happy again so my parents will 

stop worrying and yelling at me.